Change!

I see the change I was surprised myself I have never thought that you would become that person I wanted you to become one day but I'm glad and happy for you. You're the sweetest person I have ever met in my life I have learned so much from you Good and Bad I have leaned them and thankful to have an amazing person like you in my life. I know we been through so much but it's okay lets just leave those days behind and may they rest I'm just looking forward to the future right now because you deserve good even though you done bad.

Loving someone.

Loving someone that treats you like you're not a human being is a very good thing. Well, I know you guys are like "what are you talking about" but it's true. Let me say if you like or love someone let them know because it's better for them to know then not. When you don't let the person know how you feel I grantee you, you will have bad dreams about him/her. The dreams are telling you "express your feelings today because that person might not be here tomorrow". I have had the worst dream ever i cried for days just because of that dream and guess what I talked to someone I love and trust about it and she helped me find a way to figure out what the dream was about. I felt like the dream was telling me even though you know that person done wrong to you just forgive them even though you wanted them to apologize to you just go ahead and talk to them. So if you dream good or bad about a person try your best to talk to them about it. Since i talked to that person i have never had a bad dream about that person which was a good thing because the dream that i had would be the last thing i want for that person. So, what i know is people will always act so if they act like they don't care that doesn't mean they don't care they have a reason why they're acting like that.

Thoughts!

So today I thought about calling you, I have no idea why that thought came in mind. It's been a very long time since we have talked I would say I really miss you but how do i know you miss me? I look on my phone everyday looking at your number sometimes wanted to press the send but then i remove my thumb. I promise to you that you took control over me there is no day i go with out talking about you. Your pictures are saved on my computer for some reason I don't know. I reread our old conversations and think damn what happened. They said people change but I promise you changed big time. You're the type that never say how they feel about a person and I'm the type just bust out everything  you and I are two different people in all kinds of ways. If i could rewind i would take it back and delete the person who mess this one up for you and I, I have already did my part so it's time for you to man up and do yours. I really don't get why things are going like this for you and I, I understand life is crazy but sometime you have to battle it and make yourself happy. I am a happy person but not complete I'm incomplete because you're not with me if i had you then i will be happy and complete I just hope one day you realize everything and act like a man because you have never acted like one. I would say your name at the end of my writing but there is no need to if you read this you might know who you are.

P.S. I really miss you and hope things will go back to how they were!

My country!

We sit here and say we're proud

We tell others we are southern Sudanese

We never take the time to think of our actions

We have a lot of chances to change our future

But we don't use the chances that we're given

How do we expect to be free and we're not acting

Actions speak louder than words

You say you're proud don't tell me 

Show your people for the sake of your country

Sudan you're a very kind country

Your kindness have been great to us

I hope that you will heal from all the abuses

I hope that you will sit back and relax 

May we all come to one agreement

And thats to divide you into two  

WHY

Why does it have to be this way?

Why can't we just walk out?

How come we don't have no trust?

How come we act like we're okay?

Why are our hearts so secret?

Why can't we just forget about people?

When I came here i came alone

Why do i have to worry about them

Their opinions don't matter

If you worrying about them

You will lose your life

They do it for the sake of themselves

I sit lonely and watch the sun go down

Thinking one day they will feel sorry

I have pain that no one can get me out of but him

But him does not bother

I feel like him is scared

But what are you scared of huh

Is it HER that you're afraid of

They said we can change the world

I believe if you act you will change my world

They said "patient is a good thing"

I don't know if i believe in it any more

I love yall but you guys do not care

What kind of people are you guys

I don't see why yall don't feel someone's pain

You guys made me feel this way but yet

You guys don't realize it. How come?

I show love no respond

I sit quiet no respond

My question is what should I do

Patient is not working for me

Should I just go and do any crazy thing?

Where will that take me?

When you want something so bad

You can't always get it. but why?

I will continue being patient

For a little while but after that things will go my way

If that will help then i have to do that

I'M OUT!

I saw him

So I saw this guy and I thought he was so HOT
I tried my best to talk to him, well I did
He was sweet and everything but i had a problem
I couldn't continue talking to him because I think...
I still like this other dude... I know it's very hard
But He's the one I wanted to be with 
I didn't want to waste my time well his time too
So I had to let it go even though he is HOT 
They said "Don't look for LOVE in faces and places"
But yet I still do, life comes with a lot that you don't want
But you have to go through them because it's part of living
I understand giving and taking CHANCES is a great thing
I still can't take the chance of faking that I'm happy
When I'm not even near it 
I just hope people will understand how much you love them
To be honest i have never felt like this in my whole life
I just don't get the reason why I'm feeling like this
Sometimes I ask myself and people how does love feel?
But you don't fall in love for no reason 
They said "LOVE is when you think about one person constantly"
Well I think about this one dude all the times does that mean I'm in love?
Not sure because we had noting going but we just know each other
Never did anything to make me fall in love with him
I don't get love but I will love to fall and know the feelings
If I can do anything right now I will try to get that dude by my side
He's amazing, cute, polite, and outgoing just what I want
Well If its meant to happen then it will but if not then I guess not

He

He's the one that called me names

He's the one that hurt me

He's the one who said mean things about me

He's the one who is ashamed of me

And I sit here talking about HIM

It's all about HE! HE! HE! to my friends

Are you serious, was I sleeping this whole time?

If I was then thank God I'm awake

There is someone who loves me

He will do what ever to take care of me

I just now realized everything you have done to me

I am the nicest girl but yet you don't see it

Calling me a "thing" are you serious, how dare you?

To be honest with you i regret everything 

But i also blame everything on me 

If I didn't fall for your stupidity things would've been great

You lucky you had me but I'm ashamed you did

You don't deserve me at all not even a little

Heard you said "what would I do with that?"

Let me tell you something whether you deny it or not

I did not fall for you, I did not care about you

You came looking for me 

But my DUMB ASS thought you were real

You're nothing but an asswhole 

You're nothing but a hypocrite

You're nothing but a lameo 

You're nothing but a disrespectful lil dude

You call yourself a "player" right

Well you might of played them all 

But honey you did not play me and deep down you know that


So keep your fake words to yourself 

You don't know how bad I wish i never met you

You were too sweet but turned into a dush 

You may find someone to call you names

You may find someone to be a shame of you

You may find someone to say mean things about you

You may find someone to hurt you

Then you will know what you did to me

I gave you nothing but love 


People like you never appreciated the good 


they will say what ever to get the other


Thank God i don't have to worry about you anymore


You know why I'm moving to something better


Great life Sir.